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Met Gala 2013: Punk-Chaos to Couture!
2:46 AM
I don’t think that some of these celebrities got the memo
about this year’s dress code for the Met Gala!
Ladies and gents, the Fashion Olympics aka the annual Met
Gala has come upon us and has left me speechless for a while!
I wanted to write a nice little story about how pretty I
think some of these celebrities looked and keep it “Rated PG 13”… but then I
was thinking; “What in the hell were some of these people thinking???”
I wouldn’t be true to myself if I kept it that way. Because
the craziness that happened should be addressed with all of my power tantrums!
And there is no word in the DICTIONARY, in ANY language,
that could describe how I felt when I saw some of these outfits…. I'm sorry,
but I HAVE TO KEEP IT REAL!
I’m just going to cut to the chase and get straight to the fashion fabulous, the big fails and NOT to forget… the walking sofa (you already know who I’m talking about!)
If you know you are not made for straight up raw blogging,
then I now suggest you go and read another post… or just leave the blog!
Now for the brave ones who have been chosen
by the “Fashion Fairy Godmother” to keep on reading…
by the “Fashion Fairy Godmother” to keep on reading…
Let me first start by saying that I have NEVER been this
CONFUSED as to what people were wearing.
I seriously think that some of these celebrities seriously didn’t
know what to do with this year’s theme, which was PUNK: From Chaos to
Couture.
I saw A LOT OF CHAOS ALRIGHT!
Let’s start with a woman, which is close to my heart….
Let’s be REAL for a minute and have 1 minute of silence for
the fact that
BEYONCÉ SHUT DOWN THE RED
CARPET
AND SLAYED EVERYONE ON THAT M#$%^&!
(You don’t have to agree with me… just delete my phone number!)
I WILL admit that the outfit might have looked a little bit
too “matchy-matchy”,
whit them shoes, BUT I LOVED ALL THE DRAMA!
I WAS THERE FOR IT!
Beyoncé shitting on everyone’s life in Givenchy
J.Lo can NEVER do anything wrong in this Michael Kors gown!
Naomie Harris looked all types of cute in Donna Karan
Atelier
Lala Anthony went for sophisticated & classy in this
sexy Zac Posen dress!
Heidi Klum was serving royal mermaid in this strapless
Marchesa dress.
Diane von Furstenburg was giving young girls a run
for their
money in one of her own dresses!
Uma Thurman in Zac Posen…accompanied by Zac Posen himself!
Who needs a bag when you can rock a DESIGNER as an accessory?
I didn’t know Anne Hathaway had in in her, but she pulled
the punk-look
pretty well if you ask me in this Valentino Couture gown.
Even though Solange’s Kenzo dress had NOTHING “punk” going
on,
it still looked fierce and retro as hell!
Chanel Iman’s J. Mendel dress had me screaming: BEETLEJUICE!
Amar’e Stoudemire looked classy in Calvin Klein while his
(read PREGNANT) wife looked cute in a Giambattista Valli couture gown.
Amber Heard looked flawless in an Emilio Pucci
dress while
her hair was laid to the freaking stars!
Joan Smalls also got the memo of bringing the designer
of
your dress (Tom Ford) as your arm candy!
Taylor Swift, girl I didn’t know you were still relevant…
but I did love that J. Mendel dress!
Leave it up to Gwen Stefani to rock it out in Maison Martin
Margiela.
SJP gave me LIFE as she sashayed in a Giles dress paired with
a mean
Philip Treacy headpiece. Carrie was BACK in the building!
Even though I’m NOT a fan of flower printed dresses, I have
to give it up to
Anna Wintour for pulling this Chanel dress. Let’s be honest…
it fit’s her like a fresh sewed in weave!
Dear Nicki, I liked the Tommy Hilfiger dress, but I hate the
hair.
Did you like your own hair??? Or is it normal that you look
confused on
ALL pictures that have been taken?
ALL pictures that have been taken?
That’s it for all the nice comments…
now let’s get REAL!
I have always liked the many outfits that eve was spotting
on the red carpets back
in the days… but that HIDEOUS piece of fabric she was
spotting,
had me thinking I was looking at a gladiator.
NO BUENO!
Tyson Beckford is a FINE PIECE OF CHOCOLATE, BUT that suit…
The. Struggle. Is. REAL!
Where was Olivia Pope when this happened? This mess needed to be
FIXED BEFORE she stepped on the red carpet!
I don’t care if it was a Vera
Wang.That dress had too much going on…
I’m going to need for
Kerry to FIRE her stylist!
I think Rita Ora thought she was going to Rihanna’s
launching event of her River Island line…
Miley needs to go back to twerking, because apparently
getting dressed
for a big fashion event isn’t what she’s good at! (I’m not even
going to say anything
about that piece of fabric she’s wearing & that bird
nest on top of her head!)
Patricia Field?... Is that you? -________-
*cricket sounds*
If anyone else tells me that THIS woman is the best dressed
of the year AGAIN,
I’m packing my stuff and moving to Venus. She looks ready to
walk up a wall!
Katy Perry… I…hmmmm… you know what… let me just…
*sips tea*
I think Gisele’s navigation was broken, because I know
the
strip club is 3 blocks away!
So "People’s Most Beautiful Woman of the Year" decided to look
like
MotherTheresa had a make over… I see you Gwyneth!
MotherTheresa had a make over… I see you Gwyneth!
What in the hell…? …
Who is this ?????
Halloween came early this year…and I’m heavyconfused.com
because I have no
idea about who (these Olsen twins are so confusing!) or WHAT
I’m looking at!
All of you out there who said Nicole looked fine….
LYING
WON’T GET YOU INTO HEAVEN!
This had to be a joke! I don’t believe Alicia Keys was
serious with this dress…
*looks around* … Ashton… is that you in the back with the “Punk’d”
camera crew?
And last but not least….
I have NEVER been a fan of Kim K, and therefor I don’t
really care much for her.
But for her so-called “friends” and “boyfriend” to
let her out of the house looking like THAT…
I CAN’T!
These are the signs that show that this poor woman doesn’t
have people around her who love her, because if they did… somebody would have
told her she looked a hot ass mess. (and please spare me the “pregnant”
comments… Amar’e’s WIFE was ALSO PREGNANT and looked PRETTY!)
It’s the FIRST TIME she attended the Met Gala, (Courtesy of
Kanye, because we ALL KNOW Anna Wintour loves herself some Kanye…but doesn’t
care for miss Kardashian) and that’s how she got down?
Her boyfriend is a so-called designer and didn’t even have
the AUDACITY to tell her she looked straight out of somebody’s grandmother’s
living room! (Kanye needs an ass whoopin’!)
I don’t even understand why in the hell she tried that “J.Lo
– leg “ pose.
Leave it to the pros who look the part girl!
The Thirst AND Struggle is REAL out there in these streets!
All in all, I enjoyed the red carpet, didn’t know what to
think of all these newbies who looked completely retarded, BUT I had my share
of GLAMOROUS EXTRAVAGANZA!
Peep some of the pictures, which were taken during the
event!
Is it just me or does Solange’s smile look very FORCED in
the last picture?
I don’t think she likes somebody that much. Lol!
Quote of the day: Dear Kim, if you read this blog…. BURN
THAT DRESS
and holla if you want to take on Kanye… I got your back!
2 comments
haha Love Love Love your blog!! Keep it up
ReplyDeleteThank you so much! xoxo
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